Spider...

I was laying on my couch watching Netflix.
It was some cheesy dramatic romantic comedy,
with a stress on the drama and a horrible on the comedy.
I was relaxed and happy.
Then I looked at my leg and saw something on my thigh.
It took a split second to register what it was.
It was a spider.
The biggest spider I had ever seen.
It was the size of a Pringle.
I screamed.
I screamed so loud that my voice wavered.
At the same moment I screamed,
I leaped off of my couch,
throwing my laptop to the ground,
and swiped at the mutant spider.
But I have depth perception issues,
and I completely missed the spider,
so this monstrosity is still crawling up my thigh,
I swiped at it again and it fell off and crawled under the air vent.
My roommate woke up when I screamed and jumped out of bed yelling,
"What happened?
Where are you?
What's going on?
Are you ok?
Where are you?"
While running to our bathroom chemical supply,
I scream back at my roommate,
"I NEED THE CHEMICALS TO KILL IT,
IVE BEEN ATTACKED BY A SPIDER"
I grab a bottle of green cleaner and run back to the vent.
The spider has disappeared at this point,
but I spray the vent with about a pint of green cleaner.
I then sat watch by the vent for a good 45 minutes with no signs of life.
The spider was never seen again.